Love. It's What Makes a Subaru a Family Mobile

We've owned a Subaru Outback Wagon for 4 years. When we bought it, we were at our wits end trying to find the perfect combination of comfort, gas mileage, and cargo space. We even tried out American non-Jeep SUV's. The very thought sends chills down my spine. (Eww. At least none of them were Pontiacs.) I was frantically surfing the web almost resigned to getting either that dreaded SUV or letting Kris have his Mini Cooper (Cargo space? Or Kris space?) when I found OUR car. The next day, I went to work, and Kris test drove the Family Mobile. I came home, we signed lease papers, and the rest is a happy love story.

The Subaru commercials don't lie. The outdoorsy guy who lets the rain lovingly wash his Outback? So true. I guarantee families have sold a boat to make enough room for two Foresters in their driveway. And, yes, I get teary eyed at the Subaru heaven commercial because I want to believe it's true. No. I know it's true.

The Family Mobile has been our travel companion to lake houses in both Michigan and Upstate New York. He's been to Cape Cod, Maine, and lots of New England. We decided he needed a vacation this past Spring, so we took him to the Eastern Shore of Virginia. The highlight of our relationship? Letting him socialize with all the Subarus in New Hampshire and Vermont last summer. Of course he loves Molly Dog. We like to think the permanent paw imprints near the back seat windows are her way of hugging him back. The Family Mobile cherishes the bits of sand and dog hair ingrained in the seats as much as we cherish the memories we created while driving him.

But alas, the story is not "happily ever after." We leased him. The relationship had an end date from that very first day. We thought the blow would be softened by the fact we would surely buy, really buy, not lease, a new Outback. We could get one literally the same so we wouldn't even know the difference. We would say goodbye in 10 or 15 years after parking him under a big tree on a beautiful hill.

Except we bought the Grown Up Car last year. We'll own our Volvo forever and we don't know where we'll be in the next 2 or 3 years. A long term commitment to a second vehicle isn't wise right now. Leasing is the only way to go.

We went to the dealership and picked out our new car tonight. Somehow, the New One ended up having leather seats, fancy controls and a dark gray (not black) exterior. It's like the Achiever sibling to the Family Mobile. It's a really nice car. It's just not OUR car. Not yet anyway.

But we'll break in the New Subaru. She'll be going on her first Cape trip in 3 weeks. Maybe some sand and sunscreen will make her feel right. We'll take Molly to the park soon too. Dog hair adds instant love to anything. I think I may be scared to get too close because she too will leave us in a few short years. Saying goodbye is hard because... Love. It's What Makes a Subaru a Family Mobile.

Sorry!

Sorry it's been a while.  I'll be back.  It's been a busy Spring full of family, a little travel, and too many hobbies.  Not a bad problem to have I suppose.

I Believe Children Are The Future

Ahhh. Election Day. An Election Day in May is super fun. I get to vote yes for special things including schools, parks, museums, and libraries. Then I spend all day looking forward to hearing all the good news about our money going toward children, nature, and culture. Good times.

Except my optimism is usually crushed by 10 pm. I can't even pay attention to the outcome of the parks and libraries because I'm seething at all the school districts that don't pass their levies. We have one very strict voting rule in our house. ALWAYS vote yes for the schools. ALWAYS. No. Matter. What.

We vote yes because the money is for children. We vote yes because we want children today to have an education equal or better than our own. Both Kris and I grew up in solid, simple school districts. No complaints. But I had no idea what public school could be until I moved to Central Ohio for college. Many Columbus suburbs offer classes, sports, arts, and building facilities that I never dreamed existed. I excelled in college because I was smart and a hard worker. My high school education did little to prepare me for a music conservatory. I was way behind compared to my Central Ohio counterparts. I decided right then and there that I would always support the school district in which I resided. I want my future children to have those opportunities.

Furthermore, we vote yes because even if the district we live in doesn't truly "need" the money from a levy to stay afloat, many schools desperately do. We're setting a personal example for all Ohio citizens, not just Worthington residents. If the school levy in my brother's district doesn't pass, the State of Ohio will be taking over. He may very well lose his job and the district will have bare bones arts programs. Who can argue a district doesn't need money when it's basically declaring bankruptcy? Or how about the districts who have already cut 100's of teaching positions, have pay to play sports, cut bussing, and are overcrowded because levies don't pass. What else do people want from them? Budgets can only stretch so far.

So.

If you are in the majority of Central Ohio residents who regularly vote no, here's what I have to say.

You choose where you live. In wealthier suburbs, you know what your bill will look like. If you can afford a home in an affluent community, you can afford the taxes. If you don't want that burden, choose a different suburb with lower property taxes. If you live in the upper middle class burbs, own a fancy home and choose to send your children to private school you can afford the public school taxes too. Consider it part of the tuition bill. If you don't agree with how the district spends money or that the schools aren't good enough, then why send your children somewhere you deem second rate? Move to a district you approve.

For those who give the excuse "I can't afford higher taxes", you're not automatically off the hook. If your family is struggling with employment or barely putting food on the table, by all means take care of your own needs first. Now. Does that really truly describe your situation? Today, I heard someone say "I can't afford the extra $500 a year the levy will cost me." You can't afford $42 a month for the welfare of our children, but you easily spend $15 on lunch or $50 on that nice haircut? Selfish and a liar. Nice qualities to possess.

Your kids are grown and out of school? I know it's a difficult concept to grasp, but those who went before you paid for your kids, now it's your turn. You're retired and on a fixed income? Again, if you can't pay the bills, I'm very very sorry that you're reading through my tirade. But if you can, I'll remind you that my money is paying for your social security. I won't have social security by the time I retire. Give a little back would you? I'd like to donate it to schools.

Oh. You don't have kids and never will. What kind of selfish person are you? You don't need your own children to respect children. I'll put this in terms you'll understand. These kids will be taking care of you when you're old. I hope they're smart enough to change your diaper correctly, measure out the meds that keep your heart ticking, and feed you your special pureed diet. Now it's all about you. Still want to vote no?

And lastly. For those of you that complain that every single year your district asks for more money..... Yes. There are a few that do and get it. Read the paragraph about freedom of choice. But for most of you they keep asking because you say no. Every time you say no, they'll ask. Eventually you'll say yes and they'll stop asking for a few years. At some point they'll need more money and come back. It may seem like yesterday, but really it was the 5 years it failed you're remembering. They aren't the broken record, you are. If I were you, I'd get that memory checked out. And if you're diagnosed with dementia..... read the paragraph about these children being your future.

Music? Seriously? Maybe.

Twice in just over one week, I've had public spaz sessions. On Twitter. Which is pretty silly, even for me. Having a philosophical freak out using 140 characters or less is not easy. One must string several updates together to get complete thoughts out. And this was done with an audience of strangers. I don't know many of the people I tweet amongst. I share common interests with them, so they are friendly strangers, but they are strangers. Makes perfect sense that I spill my spazzy guts to them. Right?

One episode involved our Worthington dream house falling in price so much that it's silly not to buy it, and the other was over the suggestion by my horn teacher that I go to grad school (for horn performance) for (potentially) free. Why would I freak out over these things? They seem great? Seems like an easy yes to both situations. Right?

Read on, and you get to witness a rehash of the public Betsy mind battle.

Kris and I have some big plans we hope to carry out in the next one or 2 years. These plans mean we can't do things like buy a new house or make long term educational commitments. We need to stay flexible.

Saying no to the house is fairly easy. We don't need a larger home so it's just getting over the fact that we are turning down a great investment. And the chance to live in our ideal home. Forever. And easily afford it. Anyway....

It's the education part that tugs at me, and always will. Horn Teacher told me that OSU is offering full scholarships to grad level horn players. Technically, I could be very qualified. Once upon a time, I was a talented horn player who graduated with honors from a very small but good music school. I also have a background in education which is perfect since I would be teaching as part of my scholarship duties. There is one obvious downside. I just started casually playing again less than a year ago. On the grand scheme of horn ability, I currently stink. I get better literally every time I play, but I'm no where near serious 4 hours a day playing. Or a serious audition where I need to play a million technical things I haven't thought about since the day I graduated college.

There are other big obstacles. The scholarship opportunity would need to be there a full year from now, and I couldn't start until Fall 2010. The scholarships are for Fall of 2009. Horn Teacher didn't seem too concerned over that, though. If I could start on my time line, I could seriously play and study over the next year and be ready. Of course, I'd have to beat the competition and earn that golden money. I'm not too worried about that. I'm an Achiever. I do what I set out to do.

Then there is the ever important point of staying flexible. I need to stay focused. Kris and I have made a decision, and we're sticking to it. Putting off our plans for 2 years makes no sense. But the idea still tugs....

I love school. I love learning and being the geek who sits in front and knows all the answers. I love studying. I love acing tests. I love good classroom debates. I love being stressed out over perfect grades. There is nothing more exhilarating in life than having 2 major papers due, a huge test, and projects to complete during a week of non stop rehearsals and a major performance (or two). I thrive in school. I've always wanted a grad degree, but refuse to pay for one until I know the career direction of my life. That's still a big question mark. But if one were handed to me for free?

Kris reminded me that just because something is free doesn't mean you should accept it. I told him there's a huge difference between a free ugly sweater and a free $30,000 education. But he's right. For as much as I want school, 2 years of in depth horn is probably not what I want. I wouldn't put it to use. In all my career wonderings, playing horn professionally or teaching (again) aren't even a thought. When I think of what I miss about school, it's not music theory, piano or playing 3-5 hours every day. I miss the academics and lament the fact that my focused degree gave no wiggle room for expanding past the required liberal arts classes. I want a liberal arts based experience, not a music one.

I just hate turning away an idea. Especially one that someone else points out to me. Especially an idea that is challenging, free, and in many ways, indulgent. I'm going to keep it in the back of my head because Horn Teacher told me to. I should probably go practice now. It would probably help if I played more than 5 hours a week if I change my mind.

Here I come Mr. Vivaldi. You have my full attention.

Give and Take

Yesterday was the yearly Day of Reckoning in our household.  Tax Day.  The day we give our disposable income for the next 2 or 3 months to the government.  Since the minute we got married, we've owed money, and every year we hope it's an amount we can pay in full by April 15th.  Luckily, with the exception of one year where the Good 'ole USA decided we needed to fund a few extra golden toilets for a senator, we've paid in full and on time.  Tax Day my least favorite day of the year.  I keep waiting for another year of golden toilets and the consequencial financial ruin.

While Kris was off having the Tax People figure out our bill, I tried to keep calm.  At first I did OK by prepping dinner and baking brownies, but after I finished those activities, I was in trouble.  My mind started racing.  What if we owed like $6,000?  Fine.  We'd manage. What if we owed $10,000?  Then I panicked.  Although reason never came (Really, Betsy?  $10,000?),  eventually my optimistic nature kicked in.  Maybe we'd break even.  Maybe we'd get a refund.  Maybe George W. was going to say "Sorry about the misunderstanding for the last 8 years.  My accountants thought you were rich.  Turns out you're not.  Here's a little something from me to you."  That's when I was inspired to take action.

I announced on Twitter that if we got a refund, I'd donate it to charity.  After all, we're used to paying so we wouldn't need any money we got back.  We would put it to good use or enjoy it, but "need"?  Not so much.  All above joking aside, we actually don't mind our tax burden and would gladly pay more if it brought actual change to our country.  Yes. We would give away our ( now huge in my mind) refund.  Bring on the Karma.

Did it work?

Kris called with the final number.   

No refund.  

Sigh.  

But...

Our bill was significantly less than anticipated.  All we can figure is that our charitable giving last year made a big difference.  Karma.

We're so happy that we are still going to donate to charity.  We should give everything we expected to pay, but we decided to donate some and keep some for our own "need a new roof" cause.  We're making a  "down payment" to the Mid Ohio Food Bank, and then pay the rest out in May to a local arts or educational cause. 

It feels good to have a little unexpected extra and be able to give it away.  We have our fair share of bills to pay, including some pretty sizable ones coming our way this year, but I smile when I think I'll be providing food to people who need it and giving the gift of culture or education.  So thanks Tax Man.  I can give, because you didn't taketh away.  

 

Spilling the Chickens

OK.  It's confession time.  Again.

Since New Year's Eve, I've knowingly consumed meat several times.  Specifically, I've had risotto (made with chicken stock) once, 2 bites of filet mignon, 2 bites of new york strip, and 1 piece of pepperoni pizza (containing 8 pepperonis).  I might be off the vegetarian wagon.

As I've explained before, I'm vegetarian because I have huge concerns of how we raise and slaughter our meat in the United States.  I didn't have the knowledge to find beef and chickens that led a happy satisfying life, so I stopped eating them.  Going veggie was also my big contribution to a greener earth.  We use some non toxic cleaning products in our house (but started using some not so green products again last year), can go 2 full weeks on a tank of gas in each of our cars (but we really don't need 2 cars.  We live on a major bus line), and try to buy local food when possible (but eat fruit and vegetables from Mexico all winter).  The only thing I could really put a big "green" claim on was the lack of meat in our household. What has potentially changed?

Through some great local bloggers and my local market, I've found sources for responsibly raised meat.  I can trust that these farms are really growing hormone free, grass fed, free range, organic animals because they have great reputations and because I've seen pictures of their farms.  The pictures remind me of farms in rural Ohio, Pennsylvania, and Vermont that only produce meat for their own families.  Everything is green, sunny, and the animals have huge areas to roam.  That's all I've been asking for.

I also stopped eating meat because of my stomach issues that started about 3 years ago.  Being vegetarian greatly helped those problems.  My digestive system has been much much better in the last 6 months, though.   I've been eating joyously and not measuring the potential risk for discomfort every time I take a bite.  I still need to be careful, and there are still a bunch of things I'll never eat again, but it feels good to just go out and enjoy myself.

So I'm at a point where I'm considering eating the occasional few bites of steak and maybe a chicken dish here or there.  That would make me a flexitarian.  Don't get too excited.  My dabbling in meat will be very very limited, and I'm not backing down on my happy animal standard. In most restaurants and at most people's homes, I'll still go for the meatless choice.  As always, I won't ask a server or party host a million annoying questions nor do I expect a separate meal made for me.  I'm always happy with veggies and a salad (but am extremely grateful for my family and friends who do look after my dietary wishes).  

I've also made the decision to not tell my family of my choice.  Kris's family still doesn't quite grasp what vegetarian means (Pork is the other white meat.  Not the other white fruit.), and wouldn't understand my happy animal standard.  It just keeps things more simple when I bring a vegetarian dish to share, or Kris's Grandma makes some marinara sauce and pasta for me.  To be consistent, I'm not telling my own family either.  They do understand what vegetarian means, and have made some delicious meals that everyone enjoys (thanks family).  Why change that?  And this way, there will be no awkward spilling of the beans (ummm.... chickens) at a joint family celebration.  

Tonight we're having vegetarian chili.  It's as good as chili with meat.  And healthier.  Really, most of the time, I'll be cooking vegetarian.  But I can't wait to eat maybe 4 or 5 bites of Kris's double thick perfectly medium rare new york strip steak at the dinner table instead of stealing a bite in the kitchen after Kris and Katy go to bed.  And eating the pepperoni pizza in the bedroom with the door closed hoping no one would barge into the room last week was kind of embarrassing.  OK.  Really embarrassing.  So after 2 years, I will say.... "Beef.  It's What's For Dinner."  Yummy.

Who Are The People In Your Neighborhood?

Last weekend, I decided Kris and I should partake in a full evening of Worthington charm. Since we live less than a mile from our village center, I decided we would walk. In the past 7 years, I think we've walked to Worthington like twice. Shameful. I'm fairly certain we haven't patronized all the businesses yet. Shameful. Time to rectify our mistakes. Sorry Short North, Grandview, and Bexley. Time to support our own micro-economy. The original plan was to go to House Wine, Cafe Daniela, and Graeters.

We walked to House Wine and enjoyed some pours of wine in their totally relaxed and friendly atmosphere. You buy a "debit card" and use it to buy 1, 3, or 5 ounce pours from their cool automatic wine dispensing machine. The staff is super friendly and totally unpretentious, so we didn't feel stupid asking questions or chatting about our very limited knowledge of wine with them. As a side note, the owner lives in our neighborhood. It was lovely to learn that our neighborhood is filling with more and more young urbanite family types and not just my parent's demographic.

We didn't realize that Cafe Daniela closes super early, and pub food didn't seem appetizing, so we walked across the street to Worthington Inn. Ahhh... Worthington Inn. Flashback to New Year's Eve and the worst service experience ever. But we had promised to give it another try and it was too early to walk home from our evening out.

I'm so glad we went. The restaurant was its usual slow paced and quiet self, and this seemed to put the entire staff at ease. We sat in the main dining room in earshot of the live jazz from the bar, and settled into a long, satisfying dining experience. Our food was beyond incredible, and the service was simple, honest, and just the right amount of attentive. We began with the best cheese plate I've ever had. The cheese was excellent and the accompanying nut bread, fig preserves and candied pecans put it over the top. Kris had the halibut special, and I (once again) broke from being vegetarian and enjoyed one hell of a crabcake (I did avoid my side of rice with sausage bits in it). I know we had dessert, but after drinking a fair amount of wine, and a cocktail, I can't recall what it was. It tasted great though! That I remember.

I'm sorry we didn't make it to Graeters, but I think it would have been closed anyway. And truthfully, as much as we will always support them, Graeters has wandered way over the line of their original business mantra. I don't feel bad missing a visit here and there.

After dinner on our walk home, I spotted blooming daffodils. The first of the season. How perfect. Thanks Worthington!